The Fall
by mamasutra
Summary: What happens when you take things too far? Can you ever go back to normal or have you fallen too far? Cheating. EdwardxBellaxJacob **Redo of story posted in November 2019**
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. I do own all my cars though so no car payments are pretty cool.

I sat in the back of the coffee shop, not that it was dark enough to hide me.

It wasn't.

The afternoon sun shined bright through the windows lighting up the area around me in spite of my need for privacy.

"This is so dumb," I whispered to no one just as the door chimed announcing the arrival of another patron.

I looked over to see a man stride inside with more confidence than I was used to witnessing. His hair was darker than what his picture suggested and his eyes were brighter, more devilish with their gleam as he looked towards me with a grin that I had come to know so well over the last six months of texting back and forth. I did not know him, but I could pick him out of a crowd of a thousand men with that sultry grin of his.

I held my breath as he walked past the counter where the barista waited impatiently as he told her his order.

"Just a coffee, please."

His voice was every bit as rich and deep as what it had sounded in the countless videos, he had sent of himself.

_The videos._

My mind flashed to scene after scene of him naked, hard and proud while stroking himself as he told me naughty stories of what we could do if we ever met. Those videos had played on repeat in my head and often on my phone as I touched myself in time to his own strokes.

He turned to face me with mug of coffee in hand, weaving his way through the maze of tables to join me in the not so private back. He paused before me, sitting his steaming mug on the table in order to hold out his hand in my direction.

"Ms. Anon," he chuckled softly in an amused fashion as I took of his hand in mine to politely shake hands. His grip was strong, but gentle. "It's a pleasure to finally meet you."

**AN:**

**Hey all, thanks for reading!**

**Mamasutra**


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. I do own 2 cats... well, they own me.

We sat across from each other in silence.

"So, _trustmeimadoctor,_" I began uncertain of what to call him outside of his app name since we had never exchanged first names.

"Edward," he corrected me quickly with a confident nod.

"Edward," I repeated with a nod as I lost my train of thought for a second as I thought about him as an Edward. Out of all the names I had thought of for him, that was not one I had considered.

"Yes," he nodded before bringing his mug up to his lips to take a sip of the dark brew.

"Ok, Edward..." I began again only to have him cut me off.

"And you are?" he practically demanded.

"Bella," I stuttered dumbly as he smiled.

"Very fitting," he complimented me as I smiled awkwardly in return.

"Thanks," I mumbled as I wave of nerves crashed upon me, causing my stomach to twist into a knot as the silence settled between us.

"This is weird," I admitted as I looked from around the empty coffee house back to him to find him watching me closely.

"What's weird?' he asked causing me to feel even more uncomfortable as the realization that this meeting may be a bad idea.

"This..." I began then trailed off to nothing causing him to laugh a little as he looked at me.

"Bella, have you ever met someone off the app before?' he asked as I shook my head no.

"Ok," he half sighed as he looked me over. I waited for him to announce that this meeting was over since this was not something that he was expecting even though I had no idea what he was expecting.

"So.." he began as he reached for his mug once more.

"It's ok if you want to leave,' I announced, easing his departure as I gathered the napkin, I had shredded waiting for him in order to throw it away.

"Why would I want to do that?" he asked me in a surprised tone before reaching across the table to take hold of my hand. It was a fairly innocent gesture, but one that caused me to gasp as his skin touched mine.

"Because... well, because I have never done this before," I admitted trying to hide the weird sense of embarrassment even though not meeting people for a causal hook up before isn't something to be embarrassed by.

"Noooo" he said in a low dramatic tone before grinning at me in a teasing manner as his fingers interlocked with mine.

"I like that," he confessed in a low voice that did nothing to hide his teasing nature. "I like that a lot."

"Does it bother you that I'm married?" I asked him, then kicked myself for bringing up Jake like I always did. He had no place in this conversation.

"No, why would it?" Edward asked in a surprised manner as I felt his thumb rub the soft skin at the turn of my hand.

"Well, I mean, a lot of people would be bothered," I began out nervously as I thought about him, his videos, the picture of his cock, everything that a married woman should have concerning another man.

"Maybe," he agreed with a pensive look on his face that made me want to laugh. "But you're a grown woman who can make up her own mind over who she is willing to have a relationship with. Why would any other relationship you have endanger ours?"

I waited for a moment before laughing at his bull shit answer.

"What?" He demanded with a chuckle.

"That is crap, Edward," I laughed causing him to grin at me.

"Okay, first, I love hearing you call my name," he said with a grin that was just wicked enough to cause my belly to twist with want.

"Second, what do you want me to say?" he admitted with a shake of his head.

"The truth," I confessed then held my breath as he thought it over.

"OK, the truth," he nodded while letting go of my hand. I instantly felt the loss of heat from his touch. It left me cold as I waited to hear what he had to say.

"The fact that you're married and I am not does not bother me at all," he admitted with a shrug that made me smile. "I hope it doesn't bother you."

"It doesn't," confessed quickly only to back track a little. "I mean, I have other friends that aren't married so…"

As my words trailed off, I watched his grin fade a little.

"Oh, I don't want to be your friend, Bella," Edward admitted as he looked at me with a fire in his eyes that sent a ripple of want throughout me in.

"Friends go to movies together and attend lectures or even grab a beer together," he said absently as he listed a few innocent friendly gatherings.

"You don't want to do that with me?" I asked him, knowing from the look in his eye he wanted more.

"Oh, I'd go to the movies or grab a beer with you, but then I would want to take you back to my place, peel that dress off you and bury my face between those thighs of yours so I could like your sweet little pussy until you came on my tongue," he confessed in a low raspy voice that made my pussy wet.

"And friends don't do that."

**AN:**

**So, I'm sure by know that you've figured it out that I am re writing The Fall. Yes, it will be dirtier. Can't help it as I've been writing erotica. Yes, there will still be heart break, but mostly there will be sex. So, if sex & a cheating Bella isn't your thing now is the time to exit this ride. Forgive me as I stumble through this one as I am currently working full time from home (thanks Covid19) and being a para for my youngest's extended school year being on line. It is my goal to update at least 1x a week. Oh, & if you know of a beta that's cool with sex scenes and want to help a girl out send them my way... until then this is edited by my poor skills and spell check.**

**Love,**

**Mamasutra**

**Aka Lori**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. I do own '**

We abandoned the coffee shop to walk the downtown area around us. The sidewalks were mostly empty as the afternoon was winding down before the after-work rush.

I found myself glancing over a t Edward as we walked. He was definite younger than what I had thought he was by his words and picture.

"How old are you?" I asked him suddenly causing him to stop and look at me with a curiously look.

"Why?" he questioned as I shrugged, not wanting to say _I need to make sure I won't go to jail for the dick pics I have on my phone of you._

"Fine," he sighed as he pulled out his beat-up locking wallet to produce a driver license then handed it over to me.

He was twenty-eight, but he could have passed for younger with his baby face.

"Satisfied?" he asked as I handed it back while trying to hide my grin.

"Do you get carded aa lot?" I asked him with a smile only to watch him roll his eyes that suggested that might be a yes.

"How old are you?" he asked as we stood in the middle of the sidewalk in this odd exchange. Following his lead, I pulled out my wallet form my purse and then handed it to him so he could see.

"I never would have guessed thirty," he commented in an amused tone.

"Oh yeah?" I laughed feeling ancient and knowing I looked it as well.

"I was thinking you were an undergrad," he mused as I rolled my eyes causing him to laugh. It was loud and bright. I liked the sound of it.

"Satisfied?" I asked him, mocking his words to me.

"Nope," he chuckled as he took hold of my hand in his.

This wasn't the first time he held my hand. That was back in the coffee shop, but this... this was the first time I had held hands with a man in public that wasn't my husband. The feel it of it was as strange rush of guilt and thrill. I instinctively looked around to see if anyone I knew could see, but there was no one around us.

"Worried who might see me?" he teased softy as he squeezed my hand quickly, but did not let go.

"Well, I…" I began, not knowing what to say.

"It's ok," he assured me as he started walking again, talking me with him.

"I just..." I started over only to have him laugh at me with that big laugh.

"Bella, I am ok with this. I need you to be ok with this," he said as we continued to walk hand in hand.

"Tell me more about you," he practically demanded as we walked along. It was an easy conversation to talk about being an only child that married too young. I spoke of how I wanted to explore the world, but never made it further away from home than forty-five minutes.

In the moments where I fell silent, Edward would tell me about growing up in a house full of siblings while being the baby. He would talk about his job at the university and his love of science. The pressure of following in his father's footsteps, but how he was overall happy. While these were topics of small talk that we had shared on line, there was something about watching his face as he spoke pf his family that added to it.

"Bella, is this your first time of meeting someone?" He asked as he sat down on a bench.

"Meeting someone?" I questioned.

"Yes, is this the first time you've met someone from online?" he asked again, but it was clear from my nervousness that it was.]

"Yes," I admitted, not knowing if this was a good or a bad thing.

"What about you?" I asked as I looked down at the bricks beneath my feet as I sat there.

"No," he said simply causing me to turn to look at him. I wasn't surprised, yet I was. I don't know what I was expecting from him, but somehow this wasn't it.

"Oh…" I said slowly while schooling my expression as I watched him study me carefully. I could tell he was waiting for a reaction to his revelation that he has been with other strange women.

"Does that bother you?" he asked as we sat on the bench together. I could hear the uncertainty in his voice as I looked around before turning to face him.

The afternoon sun shined bright on his handsome face as he squinted to look at me.

"Did you mean meet people on line to have sex with them?" I asked him, deadpan in my best confused voice that caused him to open his mouth to speak, but I could tell he had no idea what to say.

"Because I do that all time," I said casually as I stood up.

"I mean, I fucked that guy last week," I said as I motioned towards the business looking thirty something guy that had just stepped out of the comic book store across the street.

"Hey Tyler," I called out to the guy causing him to turn and wave before walking on. I turned to find Edward staring at me, his mouth open in what appeared to be shock as he looked from the guy walking away back to me.

"Bella, I…" he began out slowly before I interrupted him.

"I'm kidding, Edward," I said as I turned to leave him there.

"Wait…what?" he called after me with a laugh before scrambling to catch up as I was a few steps ahead of him now.

"I have never met anyone for just sex. Like never ever," I laughed nervously as I walked back towards the parking garage where I had left my car.

"I'm not even sure I could it," I laughed as the ridiculousness of the situation hit me just as Edward matched me step for step. "I mean, I just met you and I just don't know... I mean I want to, but I just don't know who I am at this point."

"Bella," Edward laughed as he took hold of my hand in his and held it causing me to stop. He moved to stand in front of me, blocking the sun as he did so.

"I like you… and believe it or not, I'm ok with whatever you decide you want us to be," he said simply with a shrug. It was strangely sweet for a man who spent most nights sending me nudes.

"Not gonna lie though," he chuckled with a teasing look on his handsome face. "I am hoping that you're leaning towards boytoy verses book club friend."

"Boytoy?" I questioned him with a laugh as he nodded as if that would be enough to sway me.

"Just say the word, baby and I will boytoy you hard," he said with a grin that was more amused than leering, which only made me laugh even more.

"Whatever," I laughed as I leaned into him, actually curious about what being boytoyed hard would be like from Edward.

**AN;**

**Thanks for reading! **

**So yeah, I've been writing erotica. It's been a trip lol. What's been going on with all of you?**

**XOXO**

**Mamasutra**

**Aka Lori**


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, but I did download a mermaid erotica this morning. I'll let you know how it goes.

The afternoon passed and soon the sun started to dip in the sky. It's reds and oranges were a beautiful back drop for Edward's teasing words and warm touch.

We looped the block slowly just as the sun started to dip.

"I love the fall," I admitted as he grinned at me.

"Yeah?" he mused softly as he continued to watch me.

"Yeah, the city comes to life with the return of the students," I explained as he nodded in agreement.

"Bella-" he began as he came to stop in front of me causing me to stop as well. I looked up at him. His green eyes were bright with laughter and something else.

"Listen," he began as I stood there before him.

"I like you," he began.

"I like you too," I replied back causing him to grin at me. I was certain he had no idea how incredibly adorable he was when he grinned.

"Bella, I want you," Edward said with conviction that caught me off guard. It was a ridiculous reaction since I knew what he wanted. I knew meeting him that he wanted me. I knew this, yet I could not stop my reaction.

"What?" I mumbled stupidly as I felt a rush of heat wash over me.

"I want you," he repeated slowly as I shook my head at him. "Oh yes, I do."

He pulled me closer to him and then guided me to a small alcove behind him. I took only a moment for me to find myself pressed up against the bricks of the building behind me as Edward leaned into me. His body was so close I could practically feel the heat of skin. It sent a ripple of electricity through me as I breathed in his colloan.

"I want you," he repeated looking deep into my eyes, letting me see the desire burning there as he hovered, yet did not touch me.

"I have wanted you ever since you sent that picture of you in that white tank top all tucked into bed," he smiled suggestively.

"I could see the outline of your nipples and it just drove me crazy with it's naughty innocence," he chuckled darkly, causing me blush yet again as I thought about that night and how I was uncertain about sending it.

"Remember how I begged you to send a picture of your tits?" he continued on reminsceing. "I needed to see them and the picture did nto disappoint."

"Do you remember it?" he asked me and I nodded wordlessly.

"You have the most amazing breasts," he sighed as he brought a hand up to take hold of my waist. "Big, heavy and with the most perfect large rosy nipples that just beg to be sucked hard."

I found myself breathing harder as he described them to me.

"I cannot tell you how many times I stared at that picture and imagined what my cock would look like nestled between those beautiful tits or how amazing they would look covered in my cum," he breathed out as he gripped my hip to pull me so close, yet we weren't touching.

"Do you remember what you sent me next?" he asked with a devilish grin that only added to his charm some how.

I knew what I had sent him.

He had begged for weeks to see it and in the end, I caved and sent a full nude to him.

"You sent me that pussy picture," he whispered and then chuckled a I turned red once more, but it wasn't just from embarrassment, but also the heat of his words.

"And all I could think about and I mean, _all _I could think about was how _badly_ I needed to taste it to see if it was as sweet as it looked," he whispered as I found myself leaning closer to him until I was pressed against him. He felt hard and lean against me, so different than what I was used to and that weirdly added to my excitement. His hands gripped my hips tight against him before moving along my curves to cup my breasts for a moment before returning to my hips.

"Come with me," he whispered as leaned down brushing his lips against mine in a weak kiss.

"Where?" I asked, knowing that I would follow him anywhere.

"Come," he whispered softly, then leaned down to kiss me except this time I could feel his lips warm and inviting against mine. They moved against mine, before opening his mouth beneath mine to tangle his tongues against mine as a taste of what was to come.

He tasted of coffee and desire. It was so different than what I was used to, but I refused to think about that. This was about me and him. His arms tightened around me before sliding up my body, creating a trail of fire across my skin through my clothes.

"Ready?" he asked warm and breathy against my lips. I nodded knowing that I was more than ready for Edward.

**AN:**

**Whew! I just made it under the deadline of once a week update. I do have the next chapter ready to go as well so that will be posted hopefully later tonight . For anyone who might have volunteered their time to beta this mess I have not reached out yet as this week has been crazy with my kid. I will though & thank you.**

**XOXO**

**Mamasutra**


	5. Chapter 5

**AN: I do not own Twilight.**

Edward lead me to a nondescript glass door nestled between the yoga studio I went to and a Starbucks. I had never noticed in all the times I had been there the existence of the door or that there was an apartment above the businesses. I followed him as he opened the security door and went in.

"You live here?" I asked him as he motioned towards the stairs before me.

"Does that surprise you?" he responded as he motioned for me to go ahead of him.

"A little," I admitted earning a grin from him as I started up the stairs.

"You coming?" I asked him as I turned to find him still standing in the entry way, just watching me.

"I was just admiring the view," he mused with a grin as I rolled my eyes in response. "You have an amazing ass."

"Shut up," I laughed as he caught up to me. He pressed himself as close as he could considering we were on different steps, making us the same height.

"You do," he said as I continued up the steps, but not before I felt his hand grab at my ass. It caused me to gas in surprise. I could not think of the last time Jake or anyone had grabbed me like that.

"Damn, I love yoga ass," he growled as he grasped my ass again, cupping my cheek before smacking it a little. The sting of it sent a tingle of pleasure between my legs as I nearly tripped over the steps in front of me.

Edward's hands continued to explore, rubbing my ass before slipping one between my legs to run along my inner thigh to brush along the satin fabric that covered my core before trying to trace the elastic that held it in place in an attempt to slip underneath.

"You're so wet," I listened to him breath out behind me as I came to stop under his touch.

Part of me wanted to disappear from embarrassment from his words as Jake had never ever said anything like that to me and other part wanted to hear him say it over again. I wanted to hear him whisper dirty words to me as his hands explored my body.

Edward took advantage of the moment and was able to slip his fingers under the band of my panties. I could not breathe as he ran his finger along my slit eagerly. My knees buckled a little from this intimate touch, causing me to brace the wall to keep standing.

His finger circled my clit awkwardly as he breathed hard against me while I bucked against his touch.

"Oh god," I muttered as I tried to think of a time when this high school like exploring had made me this heated, this needy for more and I could not come up with a time.

Edward slowly started to finger me, slipping one finger in and out of me as I panted in response. I could not form words. I could only think of his hands upon me, one steadying me and the other touching me like no one had in years while I wanted more.

"Fuck," I heard him muttered softly as I tried to focus on his finger moving inside me only to gas as he added a second.

"I cannot wait to be inside you," he breathed out as I found myself biting back a moan. His fingers worked within me as I fought to remain upright and able to focus on his touch.

I was close.

So close.

It had been a year since I had orgasmed from another's touch, yet there was pressed against a wall with a stranger's fingers inside of me pushing me to the edge. I arched my back and pushed back against him, needing something more to as I hovered on the edge of bliss when the chime of the downstairs security door rang, alerting us to someone entering the building. It was a soft sound but might as well have been a gun shot for how Edward responded. His hand jerked as he yanked himself free from me and from under my skirt. The sudden absence of it nearly cost me my balance, but Edward steadied me against the wall just as a guy appeared bounding up the steps toward us. I tried to look normal, but I was certain my red face and hard breathing was a dead giveaway.

"Hey Edward," he called as he eyed me before moving past to the landing. I halfheartedly listened as Edward exchanged pleasantries with him before the guy disappeared once more.

Once he was gone, I looked over to find Edward laughing softly while shaking his head.

"That was close," I breathed out as I finally caught my breath which only made Edward laugh a little louder.

"It was," he breathed softly with a shaky laugh that hinted at his loss of his control.

"You ok to walk?" he chuckled as I took a wobbly step up. I wasn't sure, but it was easier to lie so I nodded in response. He grinned in response and then helped me climb the reminder of the stairs.

Edward lead me to a door then stopped as he pulled out his keys.

"Bella," he began slowly as he looked at me. He was handsome in a nerdy way with his black framed glasses and short on the sides with longer on top messy hair. That handsomeness was different than what I was used to, and it left me nervous as he held eye contact with me.

"Now is the time to speak up if you don't want to do this," he said simply as he looked deep into my eyes as if he was looking at my soul. "Because if you enter this apartment you won't leave until I have tasted every inch of your skin," he said backing me up against the door.

"Until you've cummed hard on my tongue and cock," he whispered leaning closer to me as I found myself fighting for air again as the ache between my legs intensified.

"Until you forget everything except my name and how I feel inside you," he whispered against my lips as I gasped just before his lips captured mine in a kiss that was too sweet for such a naughty promise.

"Say yes," he murmured in between soft kisses while his body hovered next to mine, so close yet not touching. It was maddening since all I wanted was for him to touch me.

"Yes," I whispered against his lips before curling my arms around his neck to pull him closer. The shock of my touch caused his mouth to open beneath mine just enough for me to lick his bottom lip before tangling my tongue against his.

Edward broke our kiss and reached behind me to unlock the door. I could see the tremor in his hand as he jiggled the lock and then finally the door swung open. It was so abrupt I almost fell inside, but he caught me and then gently guided me inside.

I looked around the apartment and noted how bare it was before turning back to Edward. He crossed what little space was between us to pull me to him. His body was hard and so different against mine.

His hands gripped my ass then my hips before smoothing along my curves to cup my breasts as I struggled to touch him as well. He quickly made work of my clothes, unbuttoning my blouse, pulling at the elastic of my skirt until I was standing before him in panties and bra. They were the black lace set I had bought with him in mind. The ones I had worn in the pictures for him.

Edward came to a full stop. He just stood there looking at me with a fire in his eyes that only added the heat building within me. I could almost feel his gaze on me as he looked me up and down.

"You are so damn sexy," he breathed out as he slowly began to move once more, but instead of reaching for me I watched him began to strip until he was down to his boxer briefs. My eyes fixated on the large bulge that threatened to spill out the top of his waist band as he stood before me.

Wordlessly, I reached out to trace his bulge with my fingertips before rubbing the edge where the dark wet spot on the fabric grew. I could hear the uptick of his breathing as I caressed him through the thin cotton of his boxers.

I bit my lip as I continued to touch him, feeling him grow even harder through his boxers.

"Shit," he mumbled as he breathed out, not moving away from me.

"I want to take these off you," I whispered to him as I continued to caress him.

"May I?"

Edward remained silent for a moment ignoring my request before taking hold of my arms and walking me backwards through the apartment until I fell back upon a bed. I sat back up, brushing my hair out of my face and reached out for him.

I hooked my fingers in his waist band and slowly tugged until he sprang free, hard and demanding attention. Edward quickly rid himself of his boxers as I focused on his cock.

He was much larger than what I was used to.

I reached out and touched him causing him to shift before me as I slowly took him in my hand. I breathed nervously while lady bits clenched and tingled as I felt how hot and heavy, he was against my skin.

I had spent countless hours thinking about his cock.

Hours wasted wondering how he would feel inside of me.

Hours spent wondering how he tasted against my tongue.

Time well spent touching myself as I dreamt of this moment, so I was not about to waste another moment.

I looked up at the man I barely knew while stroking him. His precum leaked out on my fingers and without thinking I brought a finger up to lick them earning a low groan from Edward as I did so.

"You taste so good," I whispered before leaning closer to lick the head of cock to taste him again as he groaned loudly. It was all the encouragement I needed before flattening my tongue to lick him from base to tip before sucking him into my mouth.

I looked up at him, trying my best to hold eye contact as I sucked him deeper since I wanted to watch his expression. I wanted to see how he looked he lost control.

"You are fucking killing me," he mumbled as his hand slipped into my hair, to help guide me to take him deeper. It was a slow process I worked him deeper then pulled shallow again as Edward guided me with panting breath and muttered curses.

"Baby," he breathed out in a pant as I looked up at him. His face was red, and he was biting his lip.

Just hearing him call me baby had me sucking hard as he was shallow before taking him as deep as I could.

"I'm going to cum," he announced unceremoniously while pulling me on to him as I pulled him shallow and sucked hard as the first spurt of his salty cum filled my mouth. I swallowed as quickly as I could as he moaned while filling my mouth with his cum over again.

"Fuck," he muttered as I let him go only for him to fall on the mattress next to me. I listened to his breathing slow as he lay there for a moment before he started chuckling lightly.

"I was not expecting that," he said with a goofy grin on his face as I suddenly felt self-conscious for the first time since meeting him.

"Expecting what?" I asked as I tried to sound normal, but it sounded off even to my own ears.

"For you to swallow," he chuckled as he sat up beside me. There was a pleased, yet smug look on his face as I rolled my eyes in response. That only seemed to make him laugh more as I felt my confidence come back with a roar.

He had no idea.

I never did.

There were a lot of things that I never did like meet men from online, yet here I was.

**AN:**

**Thank you for reading! Forgive me for being so rusty at this. As a side note, that merman erotica/romance series I had just got? Remember that? Yeah, not good, but not horrible.**

**Xoxo**

**Mamasutra**

**Aka Lori**

"


	6. Chapter 6

**AN: I do not own Twilight****.**

I sat there on the bed completely out of my element as a naked Edward laid beside me. His breathing had slowed and as it did the heat inside of me cooled as well, which allowed doubt to creep in its place.

_This is not you._

In the past I could have said that, but after blowing a practical stranger, it was looking like this was me as much as I hated it. There was only one solution and that was for me to leave before I made it worse.

Jake wasn't home.

He would never know.

This was the same lie I had told myself to hype myself up to meet Edward.

"I think… "I began as I attempted to stand up. My pulling away sprang Edward into action.

"Where are you going?" He asked as he sat up next to me. He didn't bother to grab the blanket next to him to cover up, instead he was completely comfortable with his nakedness. It was distracting.

"I think I should go home," I said as I went to stand up only to be pulled back down by him.

"But Bella," he began slowly as he pushed me back upon the pillows that covered the bed.

"I just… "I breathed out nervously as he shook his head no.

"Can I tell you a secret?" he asked me while shifting so that he was above me, I could feel his half hard cock against my leg. It felt hot and heavy against me.

"I have done nothing, but dream of tasting your pussy for the last three months," he admitted with wide green eyes that might have passed as being innocent if he wasn't naked and tugging on my panties to rid me of them.

Edward leaned closed to capture my lips with his before tangling his tongue against mine.

"I love tasting myself on you," he whispered against my lips before kissing me deep again.

His words caused a flash of heat throughout me as I thought of how my husband would never had done that.

"When is the last time your pussy was worshipped?" he asked me against my lips, causing me to shake in his arms.

Years.

That's how long it had been.

He had moved down my body, kissing as he went before, he freed me of my bra. He placed a kiss on each nipple before moving lower, working his way down until he was face to face with my heated center.

"May I taste your pussy?" he asked me as I laid there, legs spread and shaking as he breathed against my over excited flesh.

"God yes," I said in a loud voice as I covered my eyes and wiggled before him, dying to feel his tongue inside me.

I could feel his hands holding my hips down and the ticklish whisper of his hair against my inner thigh. It was just a tease as I waited for more then finally I fe3klt his tongue, flat and insistent, lap from my entry to my clit. The sensation of it caused my body to jolt with electricity as my thighs snapped shut around his head.

This did nothing to stop Edward as I felt his tongue lap again then push inside me to lap there.

I could not stop strangled cry that escaped my lips as he hooked his arms around my thighs to pull them open in order to move so he could suck on my sensitive clit.

"Edward," I cried, uncertain if I wanted him to stop or give me more as the first electric wave of pleasure crashed over me.

He focused on my clit, tonguing and sucking as he worked two fingers in and out of me as I bucked and bolted against him. My body was on auto pilot as I grasped his hair and held him them as I closed my thighs around his head once more, not that it stopped his tongue as I cried out again as I came hard and wet on his fingers.

I struggled to breathe as wave after wave of pleasure crashed over me, robbing me of being able to speak beyond his name.

Edward slowed his touch, not that it mattered as I was already lost to pleasure. He untangled himself from my thigh and hovered over me, naked and hard once more. His cock dripped on my stomach as I lay panting beneath him.

He leaned down and stopped short of kissing me. His lips were just there almost against mine.

"Taste how sweet your pussy is," he whispered against them before kissing me. I opened my mouth beneath his to take on his tongue.

I could taste the salt and vague sweetness that coated his tongue and lips. It was earthy and delicious. I moaned into his mouth as he kissed me deep before pulling away.

"I need to fuck you," he said softly in a ragged voice.

"I need to feel you wrapped around my cock," he continued on as he looked around at me. His eyes were bright from want and his lips were still wet from me. It was beautiful in a way I had not ever experienced before.

"May I fuck you, Bella?' He asked softly, not bothering to hide the lust in his ragged voice as he hovered above me, waiting for my answer.

There was so much I could have said as he gave me another chance to back out, but it was too late. I had a taste of him and what he could do. Now all I wanted to more.

"Please fuck me," I whispered, not caring that it sounded like I was begging. Maybe I was. I just knew what I needed to feel him inside me. I needed more and I knew he could give it to me.

I watched as Edward nodded then moved so spread my legs wide. He rubbed his thick cock along my wet lips, bumping against my clit with each pass causing me to cry out with surprised pleasure.

I could feel my body trying to adjust to his size as I moaned in response.

"You're so much bigger, go slow," I asked breathlessly, admitting that there was difference as to what I was used to when it came to sex.

Edward grinned, but nodded as he continued to push slowly inside of me. He would pause and distract me with a kiss or rubbing my nipples or clit before sinking deeper into me until finally there was no space between us.

I looked up at him and found him going back and forth between watching me to watching where we were joined.

"You are so fucking beautiful," Edward breathed out before leaning down to kiss me once more. I could feel every movement deep inside me.

Slowly he pulled out, leaving me panting at the empty feeling only to thrust hard full back in causing me to gasp with pleasure and surprise. He did it again and again until I was crying out his name.

I couldn't breathe as pleasure swallowed me whole. My body arched beneath his as I tried to find some sort of purchase above me as he fucked me hard and with little mercy.

I couldn't hear him over the roar of the blood rushing through my veins. I could only focus on pleasure that had always alluded me until this moment with a man that was not my husband.

**AN:**

**Thanks for reading! Thanks to everyone who is giving this story a try. Forgive me for making it filthy.**

**XOXO**

**Mamasutra**

**Aka Lori**


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer; I do not own Twilight.**

The brightness of the room slowly teased me awake. For one sleepy, perfect moment nothing had changed. Life was how it was always been, but then all that changed as the first thought entered my head.

_Jake._

My eyes shot open as I was instantly awake. I looked around me and took in the unfamiliar room as I laid there next to a man I barely knew, yet had spent hours fucking.

Adrenaline coursed through my veins as I sat and looked at the man to my left.

Edward was still asleep. His naked body was barely covered by a sheet that was draped across his waist.

"Oh my god," I whispered to myself as I took in his sleeping form. He looked so relaxed and yet still worn out. There was a sleepy satisfied look on his handsome face that I wanted to believe was something I had placed there.

I cautiously slipped out of bed, not sure what to do as I stood there naked.

_Naked._

I was naked in a bed with a man who was not my husband.

Just the thought of it caused me to gasp like a school girl.

I had done it.

I had seriously done it.

I had fucked another man.

What the hell was I thinking.

I carefully walked out to the front room, noting the ache in my hips and thighs as I moved. That hadn't happened since I was virgin.

_What the hell did I do?_

My mind filled with images of sex.

Being fucked by Edward.

The couch after pizza was delivered.

In front of the windows as I gripped the ledge.

On the counter next to a pizza box.

In the shower covered with soap.

On the floor earning carpet burns on my knees and the small of back from the friction of his thrusts.

The bed.

Oh god, the bed.

All the ways they had fucked on the bed until they both passed out from exhaustion only for him to wake me up to take me again.

My hands shook as I grabbed my skirt and slid it on. I searched the room for my bra or underwear, but could only find my bra which I put on as quickly and quietly as I could. I haphazardly buttoned my blouse as I slipped on my flats before grabbing my purse. I took one last look around, only stopping for one moment to look at the sleeping man I was leaving on the bed before opening the door and quietly shutting it behind me.

I wasted no time running down the steps and then out the security door on the side walk if the ped mall below. I could not stop myself form looking up at the windows to where Edward was above me. It was at that time that I realized that how there were no curtains to shield us. Anyone from across the street or even down below could have seen me naked. That also meant someone could have seen me with Edward.

_Jake._

Anyone could have seen us, including those who know Jake._._

Panic set in as I walked down the sidewalk, trying my best look calm even though that was lie.

_I have to get out of here._

**AN: **

**Thanks for reading!**

**XOXO**

**Mamasutra**

**Aka, Lori **


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.

I parked in the garage and sat there for a moment.

"What have you done?" I whispered out loud as I sat in my car waiting to get out.

My body ached in a way that hadn't in years. Every shift in my seat I could feel where he had been. It left me biting my lip as I remembered how deep he would go as I begged for more from him.

**Where did you go? **

I swallowed hard as I read Edward's text.

**Come back. I'm not done with you yet.**

My pussy clenched over his words causing an ache to ricochet through me as I opened the picture he had included of his hard cock.

"Jesus," I breathed out as I marveled over it once more.

"Nope, this is wrong," I breathed out clicking on my phone to close out of his messages.

"You can't do that again," I reminded myself as I opened the car door, talking out loud like I was giving myself my own TedTalk.

I walked into the house on shaky legs still reeling from the aftershock of a night of amazing sex.

"You got him out of your system so now you can move on," I breathed out as I turned on the Keurig to brew myself a cup of much needed coffee.

"Now you can focus on your marriage," I said out loud with a confident nod, knowing damn well that was lie I had told myself for over a year now.

I picked up the cup of coffee and took a slow slip. The brew did little to ease my frayed nerves, not that I expected it to. I carried it with me as my phone continued to buzz in my other hand. I couldn't bring myself to read any more of Edward's texts. I knew what they would be and while part of me wanted to be horrified, the other part wanted to read them and know how badly he wanted me again.

I grabbed some clothes as I needed to shower. Maybe washing the scent of Edward off my skin would help clear my head.

I quickly stripped as the shower heated up in the bathroom next to me. I stepped in quickly and was overwhelmed with the scent of sex and cum as I stood in the enclosed area. Just the smell of it caused my stomach to twist into a knot as I thought of Edward and the realization that at the end of time together there were no more condoms, not that this stopped us.

"What the fuck were you thinking?" I breathed out into the steam as I pressed my forehead against the cool tiles as Edward's scent swirled around me as images of his face above mine played out before me.

I slowly washing my body, taking care to be gentle as I bit my lip against the delicious ache Edward had left behind.

_When was the last time Jake made you feel like this?_

That questioned echoed within me as I tried to think of a time that Jake took me with such wild abandonment. I tried to remember when we first were together to see if there was ever a time that he ate my pussy like it was his last meal or a time when he fucked me like he would die if he didn't. It was consuming like a fire and all I could think of was how I wanted to be swallowed by Edward's passion again even though it was such a bad idea.

I was lost in my filthy thoughts when the shower curtain was abruptly pulled back. I screamed as I brought my hands up to fend off whomever had interrupted my shower.

"It's just me!" I heard him yell as I swung blindly at the guy.

"Jake?" I questioned as I slowly stopped swinging at him and looked at him.

Jake stood there with a goofy grin on his all too familiar face.

"Well, hello Mrs. Black, he chuckled while motioning towards my naked body. "I was not expecting this type of welcome home, but I must say I approve."

"Jake," I rolled my eyes at him as I grabbed the curtain to close it once more.

"Oh, no," he tisked as I grabbed the fabric to hold it open.

"I've spent all of last week thinking of your naked body and all I wanted to do with it while out in Oklahoma," he said as he started to unbutton his shirt.

"Maybe we should..." I began as I turned to wash off the body wash that covered my body.

"That's it baby, wash off and then come here so I can show you how much I missed you," he leered with a laugh that made me cringe a little.

My mind raced as I thought about Edward and now Jake.

"Maybe we should wait," I offered as I tried to put some pace between us as I closed the curtain once more.

"What is there to wait over?" he snickered pulling it back once more to reveal my naked body again.

"Is this how you want to treat your husband?" he teased, but his words were like an arrow through my heart.

He had no idea and hopefully he never would.

"Let me wash off," I said with a smile that I hoped was suggestive as I washed myself quickly, biting my lip against how sensitive I was before rinsing off. Jake shut off the water as I grabbed a towel.

I was barely out of the shower before Jake pulled me against him. His lips met my neck, kissing my wet skin as he directed me towards our unmade bed.

He turned me around to pull away my towel, leaving me naked before him. I had been naked before him countless times in our seven years of marriage, yet in that moment I felt vulnerable.

"Damn, baby," he breathed out as he eased me back on the bed. "I have been dreaming of you all week."

I watched as he stripped. I focused on him instead of comparing him to Edward, but it was near impossible. Jake was so different.

He was shorter.

Thicker.

More muscular.

My stomach lurched as he parted my legs and leaned over me, rubbing his cock along my wet slit.

"Fuck, you are so wet," he breathed out as I closed my eyes to fight the ache in my muscles and the discomfort of being that exposed by him.

"You must have really missed me," he groaned as he pushed inside of me.

The sensation of it all caused me to cry out in pleasure/pain. I closed my eyes and reached above me to find purchase he thrusted wildly into me, working himself into a frenzy.

His hands gripped my hips tight and thrust deep as he groaned as he came. I listened as his breathing slowed followed by him pulling out abruptly leaving me unsatisfied as he had many times before.

"Damn, woman," he laughed as he stumbled backwards and then sat down in the dressing room chair.

"I'm going to hope in the shower," he said with a bright chuckle that he always had after we had sex.

"You wanna grab some tacos?" he called out to me as I heard the water turn on.

I sat up and wrapped the towel around me again. I walked over to the dresser and grabbed my phone. It was lit up with messages from Edward. They were sweet and heated peppered with promises of good times to come.

Edward's final message simple.

**Did you forget something?**

I opened the picture to find his cock, hard and ready with my black lace panties hanging off of it.

"Baby, get dressed," Jake called as he appeared practically at my side as I clicked to close out of Edward's messages before he had a chance to see it.

**AN:**

**Thanks for reading!**

**Xoxo**

**Mamasutra**


	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, but I am on the look out for a new paranormal erotica so if you have a favorite hit me up.**

"It is so good to be home," Jake sighed as he leaned back against our couch.

I looked over at my husband and smiled.

"What did you do this week?" He asked as I choked on my beer.

What did I do this week?

"I…uh," I began slowly as I thought about what I had done, which was impossible without guilt threatening to swallow me whole.

_I met a guy that I have been chatting with online and have a lot of sex with him. What did you do?_

My pause as I thought about what my answer would be earned his attention.

"What happened?" he asked with a worried tone.

"Did something break again?" he asked with a groan as I sputtered for a second before shaking my head no.

"Nothing is broken, Jacob and…And if it did, I would have called someone to fix it," I said not bothering to hide my irritation with him.

"Whoa. there is nothing to get pissy over, Be," Jake said as he stood up grabbing his plate and mine to take out to the kitchen.

"You act like I can't take care of myself," I stated with the hard edge of anger in my tone.

"I know you can take care of yourself," he said with his hands up as if he was trying to stop my nonexistent attack.

"I just don't want you to have to."

His words were like a slap to my face as I thought about my time with Edward.

"I know, I just wish…" I began slowly.

"I promised your dad, you know," he said simply as I closed my eyes against the weight of guilt that threatened to crush me.

"I hate it when you use the dead dad card against me," I told him as I finally found my voice.

"Why? I did promise him," he reminded me again as I shook my head.

"My dad just wanted me to be happy," I reminded him of Dad's final words.

"And this makes you happy," Jake called as he walked by me with a beer in hand before returning to the fight that he had been watching.

"No, it doesn't," I said causing him to laugh at me, which did nothing for my mood.

"Sure, it does," he snickered as I stared at him in disbelief. "I know you, Bee."

"No, you don't" I replied, but he didn't hear me. Instead he was focused on whatever fight that was playing on the tv instead of me.

My phone chimed.

It was another text message from Edward.

I had ignored him all Saturday and most of today as I decided that I could right this wrong by focusing on Jake. He never had to know about my night with Edward. It could be ok if I wanted it to be, I just had to go back to my world without him.

I could do this.

I had spent years without him so pretending like he didn't exist would be easy or so I told myself. I braced myself before I glanced down at my phone just to see what dirty message he had sent. With a deep breath, I pulled my phone out of my pocket and looked down.

_Miss you._

**AN:**

**Thanks for reading! **

**OK, I hadn't read the reviews for this fic until now & WOW, thanks guys. Still looking for a beta, send me a pm if you are interested. I'm sending a big Iowan hug to you all. Unfortunate for you, Iowa is a dirty state that can't figure out how to wear masks or be decent to each other so now you need to quarantine for 14 days. Sorry! LOL**

**XOXO**

**Mamasutra**

**Aka Lori**


	10. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.**

"Hey Bella," Alice called out to me as I walked by her desk. I nodded and smiled hoping that was just enough for her to leave me alone.

"How was the meet up?" she called out after me, causing me to almost trip over the prison gray office carpet.

I turned to look at with what had to be a terrified look and then watched her eyes go wide as her jaw snapped shut.

"The meet up?" she repeated in a confused tone.

"What meet up?" I asked as I fought the urge to hyperventilate.

_Did she see me?_

_ How does she know?_

"The book club meet up," she said with a worried tone.

"I hate that I missed it, but Jasper had made plans to take me out of town so I.." she rambled on as I stared at her with half hidden horror.

"Oh," I breathed out as slowly chuckled nervously, willing my heart to stop pounding in my chest.

"It was fun," I lied as I smiled at her and watched her confuse ease into a happy small talk.

"You'll have to come to the next one," I said as I tried to make my escape, but instead I was caught up in a conversation that I had tried to avoid until she finally gave me the opportunity to make my escape.

I nodded and turned back, practically running to my office before shutting this door. I walked around my desk and sunk into my office chair. Without thinking I grabbed my phone off the edge of my desk and looked at it.

No messages.

It's funny the lies we tell ourselves. I had spent all weekend avoiding Edward yet reading his messages. He would send me message after message. Some were naughty as he recounted our sexy time together. Some were random things about his day. I found myself rereading them when I missed him during the quiet moments of the weekend. Part of me was disappointed while the other responsible part pretended to be pleased by his silence.

I opened my phone to read his last message from this morning. It was as a filthy picture of my forgotten black lace panties dangling off his hard cock invitingly. The taunting caption of _did you forget something _written beneath it. Just looking at it had my pussy tingling with want as a heated memory of how that cock felt inside of me.

"Jesus," I breathed out with a shaky breath as I looked at the picture once more before setting my phone down.

_Stop looking at his cock and kind words._

I closed my eyes and breathed to clear my mind from the memory of Edward, his mouth and everything that came with him when there was a loud knock on my door.

"Yes," I called out through gritted teeth as I tried to hide my frustration.

"Hey Bella," Alice said as she opened the door and stuck her head in. She looked confused as she smiled politely at me.

"You have a visitor."

No one ever came to see me.

Maybe Jake, but that was rare and very well planned out much like everything in my life that Jake was a part of.

"Send them in," I called as I smoothed my hair in the loose bun that held my air before standing up to greet this visitor.

The door opened and Alice motioned for him to come in.

He looked exactly like my dreams except he was in a gray suit that somehow made him look even sexier and more established than what his jeans had. He had a bright, teasing grin on his face as he stepped into my tiny office, taking up more space than what I thought was possible.

"Bella," he greeted me as Alice closed the door, shutting me in the room with him.

"You look like you've seen a ghost," he snickered as he sat down on the other side of the desk from me.

"Edward," I breathed out as I felt my heart pound hard in my chest.

"Please sit down," he said softly as he pointed out I was still standing and staring at the man I had left behind after what should have been my first one-night stand.

"How…" I began slowly as I tried to find my words despite how I could not breathe.

"You dropped this," he said as he reached into his coat pocket and pulled out my lanyard with work ID badge. I grasped my temp badge as it hung limply around my neck on a dingy looking lanyard.

I didn't even think of him when I couldn't find my badge this morning. It did not cross my mind that I had left it behind, yet there he was with my badge in his hand.

"Thank you," I breathed out nervously as I watched him set it on my desk in the space between us.

"You're welcome, Isabella Black," he said innocently, but there was nothing innocent about his words.

He knew my name.

He knew my name and was sitting in my tiny office.

"Edward…"

"I almost overlooked it, but when I was cleaning up the apartment there it was on the floor by the couch," he explained softly as I stared at him wide eyed and mouth agape.

"You know my name," I breathed out as I struggled to catch my breath.

"I do, but..." he began with a wave of his hand, but I could not hear his explanation.

"You know my name," I repeated as panic washed over me.

"We agreed..."

"I know what we agreed, but I thought it was dumb idea..." he started to say as I rolled my eyes.

"It was not a dumb idea," I snapped at him as realization washed over me that he knew my name.

He had known my name for days now.

He could have looked me up.

Found out where I lived.

Anything was possible because he knew my name.

Edward remained silent as he reached into his pocket. I watched him pull out his wallet and then remove a card. Wordlessly, he handed it to me.

It was his driver's license.

"What is this?" I asked him as I held the plastic card in my hand.

"Now you know who I am too," Edward said with a confident smile that made my stomach flipflop as I looked at him.

**AN:**

**Thanks for reading!**

**I hope to have another update tonight.**

**XOXO**

**Mamasutra**


	11. Chapter 11

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, but I have been watching the movies again. **

"Edward Cullen," I said out loud, letting his name take shape on my lips as he watched me with an amused look.

"You knew that," he chuckled softly as I shook my head.

"Yes, you did," he argued with me as I rolled my eyes at him.

"Bella, I handed you my driver's license when you questioned my age. Did you not look at my name?" he said with a soft laugh as I looked at him in disbelief.

"I was only looking at your age," I explained, suddenly feeling stupid for not looking at his name.

"I am not good at this," I whispered to myself before finally meeting his gaze.

"You're doing just fine," he chuckled causing me to roll my eyes which only made him laugh louder.

"Bella, I am your first one-night stand," he asked me with a curious look on his handsome face as he keened closer to my desk.

"Shhh,' I shushed him as causing him to grin wider.

"And yes," I confessed softly as he nodded.

We sat in silence for a moment looking at each other.

"I'm sorry," I said then cringed because I was tired of saying I was sorry when I wasn't. I wasn't sorry about my time with him.

"Don't ever apologize for being with me," he said simply, catching me off guard.

"I'm not sorry about that," I said softly as I looked at him. His green eyes were soft and had a sultry look to them that made my nipples tighten just looking at him.

"Me neither," he stated.

"What do you want from me… from this?" Edward asked in a low tone that hinted at so much more than his words.

"I think…" I said then slowed as my throat went dry. "I think we should go our separate ways."

He was silent as if he was considering what I suggested.

"Why?"

"Because… because it was amazing, but… But I'm married and I can't do that again," I stuttered as he held my gaze. His green eyes were warm and knowing as if he could see through my lie.

"Because you're married," he repeated slowly as he looked at me with a slight grin, but there was nothing amusing about it.

"Yes," I nodded as he nodded with me.

"When was the last time he made you cum?" he asked me abruptly as I stared at him, unsure of what to say.

"Edward…"

"Or made you feel like you weren't alone?" he continued on as if I had not spoken.

"Or even made the pretense of caring about your day?" he said as I looked away knowing damn well, it had been ages since Jake had come close to doing anything like that.

"We're just in a rut," I whispered, knowing it was lie.

"A rut that lead you to me?" Edward asked so earnestly that it hurt me to listen to.

"I'm not complaining, Bella. I love that I found you, but ruts don't lead you to another person," he continued on as I watched him shake his head.

"Listen, we can go our separate ways and you can focus on your marriage to assuage whatever made up guilt you have for doing something for you for change, but I promise you unless he's working on the marriage too it will fail. You will find yourself in six months just as lonely and just as lost as what you were when we met," he said softly, but with such certainty that it hurt to hear.

"I…" I began trying to build up an argument against his, but he cut me off.

"I promise you, Bella. I promise you that is what will happen."

**AN:**

**Thanks for reading!**

**XOXO**

**Mamasutra**

**Aka Lori**


	12. Chapter 12

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.

"And then he left," I finished in a rush as Angela listened to how I had a visitor.

"He just left?" she questioned, but I could hear the disbelief in her tone.

"Yes," I replied with nod as I sat in my car alone, not that she could see me.

"I don't know, Bee," she breathed out as I closed my eyes and shook my head.

"I mean, what he said… I mean, he's not wrong," she sighed as I listened to her. I could pick up the irritation in her voice as she spoke.

"And he just left?" She questioned me again as if she knew I was holding back.

Ange didn't need to know that I had agreed to meet him with hopes of getting my panties back. I knew what she would say, and I didn't want to hear it.

"Yes," I lied, but even I could hear the falseness in my tone.

"That doesn't seem to fit his MO," she tisked as I remained silent. I knew if I opened my mouth, I would tell her the truth.

"I mean, he went to the trouble of finding you to give you back your work badge so I can't imagine that he would just leave after speaking some much needed truths to you," she mused then stopped with a gasp.

"Oh my god, Bella!" she practically screamed into the phone for me.

"You've be Tedtalked!" she cackled loudly as I closed my eyes and rested them on the steering wheel of my car.

"You are no help at all," I breathed out as I listened to her laughter go on the other line.

"I'm sorry," she wheezed, trying stop laughing at the horrible situation that I had placed myself in.

"I'm sorry," she breathed out again as I listened to her.

"I know you didn't support this," I said slowly as her laughter faded.

"That's not exactly true," Ange corrected me, still half chuckling at her own lame joke.

"I told you that if you were unhappy with Jake… and you are… you could either leave him or try to work it out," she stated in a judge tone that I hated.

"I did not say to find a side guy to bang who would give you depressing life advice," she snorted smugly as I shook my head.

"I can do without the judgment," I said in a meager attempt to defend myself.

"I'm not judging you," she said in a softer tone that reminded me why we had been best friends for ten years. "I would never do that."

"I don't know how you've last this long with Jake," she said with the same tone of disgust that appeared whenever she spoke of my husband. She had never been a fan of his, finding that he was too arrogant and thought too highly of himself.

"Life is too short to be wasted with a man who can't take directions on how to make you cum," she said solemnly, repeating the same thing she had told me once I admitted that sex with Jake consisted of me taking care of business once he was done.

"I think it's weird that a guy that went to all that trouble for your badge only to leave you," she mused as I bit my lip.

"Yeah, it is, right?" I breathed out as I knew she was waiting for me to say something.

"You're meeting him again, aren't you?" she asked flatly as I shook my head to lie to her even though she couldn't see it through the phone.

"I just need to have some closure with him," I admitted then listened to her groan loudly.

"Bella, what closure is there to have?" she whined to me, but she didn't understand. I had spent month talking to him. I knew what books were on his nightstand by his bed. I knew what his beliefs were when it came to religion and general life philosophy.

I knew him well before I had ever met him, and he knew me. It was a weird online relationship where we texted, sharing our days long before I met him for a convenient fuck as Ange had once so eloquently put it.

"I know you don't support this," I said slowly as I tried to find the words to make her see that this was the only way I could end things with Edward.

"No, I don't" she cut in quickly only to sigh with resignation.

"But I am totally team Bella, so if this is what you need right now, then how can I oppose it?" she said softly trying her best to sound optimistic about my bad life choices.

"Where are you meeting him?"

"Uhm. I'm meeting him in the parking garage," I said slowly as I listened to her silence. She didn't have to say anything. I knew despite her cheery tone from a moment ago.

"That seems pretty safe," she agreed slowly, but I knew she didn't think that. "Just be careful."

"I will," I promised even though I knew all too well there was nothing safe about meeting him.

**AN: **

**Thanks for reading. **

**Xoxo**

**Mamasutra**


	13. Chapter 13

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. I do own Midnight Sun. What do you all think of it?

I found him exactly where he said he would be.

Top floor of the parking garage waiting outside his car. I could see his dark hair ruffled by the wind and his sleeves rolled up to his elbows in a way that I had always found strangely attractive.

I parked close to him and stepped out not that he looked over at me. He was focused on crowd below.

"Hey," I breathed out as he turned to look at me with a teasing smirk that caused my stomach to flip with nerves.

"Hey," he said as he motioned me closer.

It was a dangerous move since being close to him made me do dumb things, but I did it anyway. Soon I found myself right next to me, almost touching while benefiting from the heat his body gave off.

"What are you watching?" I asked him as I looked over to watch the people below. Most were leaving work. There was an energy from the crowd below that carried up to us as we stood above them observing.

"Just people," he shrugged as he turned to look at me. His green eyes were dark and stormy as they met mine.

"I like to watch," he admitted with a devious grin that I knew all too well and my body reacted to it. I felt a burst of heat wash over me as I felt my face go red.

I knew he liked to watch.

So, did I.

"Bella, I think it would be a bad idea for us to call this... this... this thing off," he said simply as if what we had going on between us was not wreckless sex, but some sort of a causal business deal.

"Edward..." I began, trying not whine as he had no idea how hard this was for me to do. I had never broken up with anyone and while this wasn't a conventional break up, it still needed to stop.

"What do you want?" he asked me abruptly causing me to sputter as I had no idea how to respond.

"You've asked me that before," I said as I watched him grin and shake his head.

"I did, but you really didn't answer the question, did you?"

I hadn't, not that I was about to admit it.

"Okay," he drawled out slowly, silently noting my refusal.

"I'll tell you what I want," he said simply as he turned to face me completely. This act of openness left me a little uncomfortable.

"I want to continue what we started," he stated in a matter of fact tone that made me smile.

"I want to take you out for dinner and then take you back to my place to fuck you savagely," he declared as I blushed for him.

"I want to text you during the day and maybe meet you for lunch," he admitted with a thoughtful nod.

"I want to text you at night when you are sitting on the couch next to him and get you wet with my word," he chuckled darkly as he brought up how our time together began.

"I have no intentions of changing your status or mine," he continued on as I looked at hm. The storm in his eyes did not match the calmness of this tone at all.

"Do you hear me?" he asked as I as if I hadn't. My silent nod of my head did not seem to appease him as he sighed before running a hand through his wind whipped hair.

"Maybe it would be easier to explain what I don't want," he chuckled as if there was anything amusing about this conversation.

"I don't want to end your marriage," he stated.

"I don't want to meet your friends …or your mother," he laughed softly as I looked him, unsure of what to say.

"I don't want to waste your time or mine for that matter," he chuckled as I smiled and shook my head at him.

"I'm not, am I?"

"I didn't say that," I argued, not that he cared.

"You're an intelligent woman and if you really thought I was wasting your time, you would have walked out on my long before this moment," he said softly, calling me out in a way that no one had before.

"Tell me, Bella, do you want to end this between us?" he asked me as I shrugged, giving away my indecisiveness when it came to him.

"I'm married,' I whispered causing him to cock an eye brow at me. I shrugged as even I could acknowledge that I was sounding like a broken record.

"I told you, I don't care that you're married and have no plans on pushing to change that at all," Edward said with a laugh that made me shake my head again.

"I don't think he would…" I began only to be cut off by him.

"I didn't ask what he wanted. I asked what _you _wanted," Edward corrected me with a firm tone.

"When is the last time he asked you that?" he demanded as I looked down.

"When is the last time he asked you, what would make you happy or what you need?" he continued on as I looked up into his eyes.

He knew.

Jake never did this.

"What is so wrong with being a little selfish every once in a while?"

**AN:**

**Thanks for reading! **

**Xoxo**

**Mamasutra**


	14. Chapter 14

**Disclaimer: I do not Own Twilight. I did buy The Book Caste that came out recently. Pretty interesting.**

Edward Cullen made selfish sound desirable, but that could be because I wanted him.

I wanted to be that selfish.

"It's ok to be selfish, Bella," he said as he brought a hand up to cup my cheek in a tender manner as he stepped closer.

Edward leaned down and brushed his lips against mine in a soft kiss. I could not stop the soft sigh from escaping my lips as he did.

"Tell me you wanted that," he practically whispered.

"I do," I admitted and then watched him grin.

"I want this,' I continued on as he nodded, encouraging me to tell him more.

"I want…I want you," I said, giving in as he pressed another kiss against my lips.

"Tell me you thought about me this past weekend,' he whispered against my lips, as I bit back a moan,

"Tell me that you could not stop thinking about how good I felt inside you, because I could not," he admitted before kissing me again, except this time slowing my low moan.

"But..." I muttered against his lips.

"No buts," he stated as he silenced me with a kiss.

"Don't say no to this," he whispered as I closed my eyes.

I could not help, but to think of the bible story how Eve gave into temptation and ate from the forbidden tree. It had never made sense to me because she knew the rules and they were simple, yet she broke and did any way. Was the promise of having her eyes opened to the truth or was it just something as simple as wanting what you can't have?

**AN:**

**Thanks for reading!**

**XOXO **

**Mamasutra**

**Aka Lori **


	15. Chapter 15

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.**

"There you are," Jake called out in a jovial tone, but I could hear the tension cut through it.

"Hey," I greeted him weakly as I noticed a couple sitting with him at the table.

"You remember Emmett and Rosalie McCarty?" Jake asked me in a prompting tone as I looked from him to this couple who sat there watching me with a curious look on each of their faces.

I had never met these people before in my life.

I never went to work functions with Jake.

He had said it was because he didn't want to mingle home life and work life, not that I had cared since I wasn't interested in his work, but now I was regretting not going.

"Of course," I lied as smoothly as I could as I felt Jakes hand in the small of my back pushing me toward the table.

His rough touch seemed jarring in comparison to the man I had just left.

_Edward._

My lips were still swollen from his kisses.

"Where were you?" Jake hissed under his breath as he leaned in for a quick peck on the lips.

"I didn't know about this," I replied softly as I shook my head at him.

It wasn't a lie.

I had no idea about this after work meet up.

"I called you," Jake half growled as I sat down in the booth beside him.

He had, not that I had bothered to pick up.

_"He can wait," Edward whispered against my neck as he kissed me. His fingers swiftly unbuttoning my blouse as I straddled him in his car. "You're mine right now."_

"Isabella, "the man greeted me with a wide friendly grin as the woman looked at me with a hard look on her face.

"Bella," I corrected quickly only to have Jake interrupt.

"She goes by either," he lied.

"Bella," the man repeated, ignoring Jake as he looked at me with a nod.

"Jake was saying that you work for the hospital," he continued as Jake shifted beside me, ready to answer.

"Yeah, she works in billing," Jake explained as I opened my mouth to speak.

"Actually, I no longer work in billing," I corrected my husband with a scowl that I had not bothered to hide resulting in the couple across from us to exchange a surprised look.

"I manage a team of thirty people who work establishing in home care for patients as they go home," I said as I looked at him, not that Jake seemed to notice my irritation.

"What do you?" I asked the man defiantly who grinned at me while his wife continued to scowl.

I half listened to him explain his role at McCarty Enterprises even though it was clear by his name that his role was being the heir apparent, but outside of that Emmett seemed to be a decent guy with a kind eyes. His wife, on the other hand continued to be cold and silent. Under normal circumstances, I would have been nervous, but I could not find it in myself to be bothered. I could only blame Edward for that.

_"Do you have to go?" He whispered to me while attempting to make sad eyes at me as I struggled to get off his lap, but he held me close._

_ "Jake called…" I trailed off, not wanting to admit I did not want to go, but instead I wanted more of his time and touch instead._

_ "Who care what Jake wants?" he chucked as his hands slipped under my skirt again to caress the soft skin between my thighs. "What about what I want?"_

_ His touch dipped between my legs to trail over the damp silken cloth at the apex of my thighs. It was an intimate touch that left me panting for more._

_ "What about what you need?" he questioned as he moved the cloth aside to touch me more boldly as I gasped in surprise._

_ "You think I need it?" I said in a tone that sounded more desperate than defiant as I had hoped as he shifted beneath me, giving me access to grind against him._

_ Edward remained silent, but instead pulled me in for a hard kiss with one hand just as his other pushed the fabric of my panties aside._

"Right, Bella?" Jake asked me impatiently, pulling me back to the present.

"Yes, of course." I agreed simply, having no idea what I was agreeing to as I looked at him and smiled through my red cheeks. Jake met my grin with one of his own, but he did not seem to notice my red face or the heat that came with it.

"Another beer, babe?" Jake asked while flagging down the waiter who had just walked past. I murmured a soft yes just as my phone vibrated an alert hard on the table. I picked it up to find a message from Edward. Carefully, I opened the message to find a picture of what had been the panties I had been wearing hanging off his rear-view mirror in his car like some sort of obnoxious trophy. Followed by the teasing message;

_You forgot these._

_**AN:**_

_**Thanks everyone for being patient with me. Back in August my area was one that was hit by the derecho in the Midwest. We lost 3 tree and was without power for 2 weeks and then internet for another 3. I am back and my house is put together sooo no it's back to writing.**_

_**XOXO**_

_**Mamasutra**_


	16. Chapter 16

**AN: I do not own Twilight.**

We left the restaurant hand in hand.

It felt odd to hold Jake's hand since it had been ages since we had touched so innocently. The feel of his slightly gruff skin against mine transported me back to high school and the nervous twist in my stomach each time we touched.

It had been years since that I had felt that.

"What's with the frown?" Jake asked me as he walked me to my car.

"What was that about?" I countered, deflecting any conversation about my feelings back to weird meet up with his work friend.

"What do you mean?" he asked as I pulled my hand from his.

"Work friends?" I asked in an incredulous tone that earned an eye role from Jake as I motioned him forward towards where I had parked.

"Oh, come on," he groused before grabbing my hand again.

"You have complained for years about not knowing my work friends," he said with a shrug as if this meeting was nothing, but I knew he was lying.

I could feel it and when I looked at him the sheepish look on his face gave him away.

"You're a liar, Jacob Black," I stated in a firm tone and watched his face pale for a moment.

"I have asked for years and you have never cared until tonight... and... and even then, you gave me no notice. Like none. Just a call asking where I was," I growled at him, not bothering to hide my irritation with the situation.

"What is up with you, Bella," he countered back, stopping in his tracks, basically forcing me to stop as well.

"What do you mean?" I asked him as I felt my stomach drop in fear.

_Edward._

Did he know?

There was no way he could know.

I had been careful, and it had barely happened so there was no reason for him to know about my time with Edward.

"I mean, you used to be interested in what I was doing," he replied softly. His brown eyes that always been a window into his soul reflected a sadness that made my heart hurt.

I swallowed hard against the guilt that was threatening to overtake me as I stood before him.

Looking up at him, for a split second he was the Jacob I remembered. The one who had a quick laugh and warm smile. The one who I could count on to be there before five plans of success and keeping up with the Jones' took over the man I loved.

"I still am," I said softly, feeling myself shrink once more.

Jake smiled in response to my kinder tone.

"But…But this is weird, Jake," I added trying to find my edge once more, but it was hard I as felt my phone buzz with a message that was no doubt from Edward.

"What's so weird about wanting them to meet you?" he asked with a hitch in his voice that appeared every time he lied to me. I rolled my eyes in response.

"Because you haven't cared before," I called him out as I took a step closer to him, willing him to start walking again.

"That's not true," he replied while rubbing his neck in a nervous manner that made me laugh darkly.

"You're such a bad liar," I chuckled until he closed his eyes and shook his head.

"Fine," he sighed as I found myself laughing louder as if I had won something instead of catching my husband in another lie.

"But it matters now," he assured me, catching my hand in his. It was a move that caught me off guard just enough for him to pull me into a warm embrace. As his arms wrapped around me, enveloping me in his never-ending warmth. He leaned down and softly brushed his lips against mine in the sweetest of kisses.

"Let's go home," Jake whispered against my lips as his hands brushed my hair out of my face. It an innocent gesture and reminded me of summer days spent by the river from when we were kids.

I couldn't find my voice.

It was lost as I struggled against the urge to confess all my sins, so instead all I could do was nod in agreement.

**Disclaimer: **

**Hey all! Hope all of you are doing well and staying healthy.**

**Xoxo,**

**Mamasutra**


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